Before I talk about anxiety, I wanted to talk about how autism is a spectrum disorder. Brother is on the high end of the spectrum. He missed an Asperger's diagnosis by one thing, his language skills. However, his problems are many and varied. He just functions better than some. Because autism is a spectrum disorder, not everything Brother has issues with will be a problem for another person on the spectrum.
Anxiety has always been with Brother. I was never able to leave him for the evening for a night out. I'd spend weeks reassuring him and it was not worth what we all had to go through after. Last year, I began leaving him with Ben for the evening once a month for a knitting night. He spent the first few times awake and would not go to sleep until I came home. Gradually, he has been able to fall asleep without me in the house. It is a big step for him. His anxiety got the better of him, but he's been able to conquer a bit of it. It has helped that we've been in this house for longer than 2 years. That's the longest we've ever lived anywhere. We have been in this area for longer than that, but we were in a rental before.
He also gets very anxious before big holidays. For while, the weeks between Thanksgiving and Christmas were filled with sleepless nights and lack of appetite. He would look gaunt by the time Christmas rolled around. His anticipation turns into anxiety. He's getting better as he's maturing.
Another thing that has helped is living near my parents. They are an anchor for him. We have to visit so he can calm himself periodically. If we go too long between visits, his behavior starts to suffer.
I worry about what his behavior will be like when Ben deploys, but I know it won't be as bad as it would have been had we moved away from this area. He would've suffered greatly if we left Texas.

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