Please bear with me as I grieve. I don’t think I can make it to the funeral and it’s sunk me pretty low. Too many forces are against me and I think God is telling me something. I feel this need to talk about this friend of mine. I tend to be very stoic so I’m pouring myself out here on this blog. I just got this link to a news article about Dave. There’s a wonderful picture of Dave and his family before he returned to Iraq after his R&R.
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It rained almost all day today. We had our house inspection before closing (supposedly this Friday, but most likely on Monday) today on top of therapy. I have a one hour drive each way. So, in the rain, I had a lot of time to think. It’s been a bit of a melancholy day. Here are some of my random thoughts:
- I think at times I felt such disbelief at my friend’s death. Even after speaking with his widow. Even after hearing the grief in my husband’s voice. I don’t know why, but this makes me realize–It’s true. I won’t ever get to talk to him again. All my teen and adult life I’ve always been the one to take care of things–my brothers, my husband, my children. I don’t resent it at all. Dave was one of the few people who took care of me. He really was like an older brother (I always wanted one). Oh, I miss him so much.
- Why is it that when people ask me how I’m doing with all this, I tell them, I’m doing okay? I’m not. I want to scream and cry at the sadness of it all. This has always been a big thing with me. I never will say if I’m down or sad or mad or anything. Is it cultural? In Korea, a sick person won’t tell his family about his illness. He doesn’t want to burden his family with it. That’s also why during their economic crisis, the men who didn’t have jobs left the house acting as if they were still working. Not to worry the family. Now, mind you, this is not healthy, but it seems I’ve picked it up.
- I should be happy about the house, but frankly, I’m so tired that I don’t want to move in. Ugh. The thought of moving everything and then unpacking all those boxes. Ugh. Yuck. All I can say is it will take a big crane to pry me out of that house. I’m staying.
- There’s too much information out there. Just too much. My little brain can’t get wrapped around it. What am I talking about? Treatments for autism. Brother has auditory processing difficulties. This makes read alouds difficult because he can’t attend or hear what’s going on. I’ve tried so many different ways of doing it. Maybe the newest thing (The Listening Program) we’re going to try will work.
- Papa was slated to escort Dave home. That means he would have left early for home. Some higher ranking officer pulled, well, rank. It stinks. We’ll have to wait two more weeks.
So, as you can see I’m pretty melancholy. On the flip side although I didn’t get any pictures, the house is beautiful. Absolutely beautiful.
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Cheryl tagged for this.
- I dislike reading out loud, but I do it because as Father Corapi once said, "Love is sacrifice.". I love my children and know that reading is one of the best things to do for them so I do it. Sometimes very reluctantly, but usually very enthusiastically.
- I’m an office supply nut. I love any office supply store, the office supply aisle at stores. Give me colored paper, pens, markers, binders, you name it and I am happy as a clam.
- I am a ridiculously patriotic person. I’m a naturalized citizen and there’s almost nothing that rivals hearing the Star Spangled Banner.
- Along with number 3, I absolutely love Lee Greenwood’s song "God Bless the USA".
- My friend, Dave, once (pre-kids) gave me a skydiving lesson for my birthday. It was absolute wonderful.
- I am not a confirmed Catholic. I hope to be confirmed soon, but am having trouble getting the proper documents. I know we had them once because I had First Communion.
- Chocolate is my favorite food. How can it not be anyone elses?
- I used to be the student manager for my college men’s basketball team. I traveled with them everywhere. It was so much fun and I was able to visit so many states.
- I’m a sap. Commercials make me cry. I remember in college watching a Hallmark commercial and crying.
- I’m extremely shy. The above number 8 helped me to not necessarily overcome it, but to learn to work around it. When you are walking across the court with the team before games, halftime and end of the game, you sort of learn to get used to being out there.
I think everyone else has been tagged. If you haven’t then know I’ve tagged you!
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We met while my husband was stationed at Fort Bragg. He and my husband were assigned to the same unit and became fast friends. He had quick wit and kept me laughing all the time. He had a generous spirit. He was what I called a closet softie. He was all bark and no bite.
Yesterday, he was killed in action by a roadside IED. He leaves behind a wife and 4 month old son. I am having such difficulty with this tragedy, but his wife is a true wonder. Even in the midst of her sorrow, she knows that he died doing what he believed in. He thought we needed to be there and that we were doing a good thing. She also knows she will meet him again.
Please pray for my friend, Major David G. Taylor. I loved him like he was my own brother. I miss him terribly.
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Get ready to laugh and cry reading this Loveliness Fair hosted by Elizabeth. Get a cup of something warm (it’s cold even here in Texas) and a box of tissues.
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When Brother was a baby, he never cried when he received shots. He was a mellow baby so I thought it was just part of his personality. Since receiving his diagnosis of autism 2 years ago, I realize it was he did not feel the pain. He cannot feel soft touches on his body and if he does, he can’t stand it. You can see it in how hard he grips his pencils. There’s a name for it, but I don’t remember it. It’s part of his sensory integration dysfunction. I’ve read too many technical terms in these past years to be able to keep in my head. So, one of the problems we encounter is this:
We went out to eat with my family last night and a mosquito or two entered the car with us. These awful bugs went to town on Brother. He didn’t realize he had been bitten until they started to itch. By then, the mosquito(s) had dined quite well on Brother.
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One of my favorite bloggers, Dawn, has a great post about her homekeeping notebook. It’s perfect timing as I’m working on putting mine together.
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You all know about our "field trip" to Niagara Falls, Canada. I was fully prepared for the extra security measures. I only carried medicine and baby food in my carry on. In Austin, we did not have any trouble at all. They let us through without a hitch. I was taken aback when I realized we all had to remove our shoes. Even 16 month old Pumpkin has to remove her shoes. I think she was a bit shellshocked. I remove her from bed at 4 in the morning and take her through this strange ritual of baggage and security check. Little did she know how stranger it was going to get.
The flight to Chicago went off without a hitch. Honey and Pumpkin fell asleep almost immediately. This made the trip very bearable. Brother and Sister took out activities that were in their rolling backpacks and occupied themselves throughout the flight. It worked out rather well.
In Chicago we landed in the F terminal and, of course, our next gate was in the C terminal. Sigh. So, I with my 4 and my sister, her husband and their 2 trudged to the shuttle bus stop. Well, we had strollers. The lady barked at us to fold them up. No explanation–just fold them up. To get to the buses we had to walk down some stairs. If she had just told us there were no elevators we would have known what to do. I was surprised because I thought people in Chicago, a city in the Midwest, would be friendly. Well, not this lady. She snapped at my 3 year old nephew to essentially hurry up down the stairs. I wonder how disabled people get to their gates. We did make it to the gate although a bit grumpy.
On our return, I had my carry on bags checked by the TSA. I wasn’t upset, but it made me wonder why in Buffalo, but not in Austin. Maybe it’s because Buffalo is so close to the Canadian border? I’m not sure. The things that were checked were the baby food and the medicine. I carried Motrin, Tylenol and Albuterol. The man kept thanking me for waiting patiently. I told him that if I can wait 6 months for my husband to come home from Iraq, I can wait 5 minutes for him to search through my bags. After that, no problems. Buffalo’s airport was great because they had a little play area for the kids to burn off some energy before boarding.
All in all, the actual travel part went well. The kids behaved very well on the plane. I do wish that people would not give such dirty looks to us when the babies were crying. There’s only so much a mother can do to calm a baby (yes, my 16 month old is still my baby) on an airplane. I didn’t keep the baby crying on purpose. I did my best as did my sister to keep them calm and quiet.
There’s much more to post about our field trip. We’ve had family visiting from Korea so seat work has been a bit neglected, but we are learning quite a bit.
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Pumpkin has had a cough for about 2 months now. It had been going away, but last night it came back full force. She coughed all night, all morning and all day. I tried to get her an appointment in the Pediatric Clinic we’re assigned to, but they had no appointments today. I tried calling to make one for tomorrow, but they changed their hours (when did that happen?) and I was too late.
After a full day of therapy, errands and Little Flowers/Blue Knights meetings, we arrived home at 6:30. I found she had thrown up on the way home after a particularly hard coughing fit. After dinner, I noticed she was having difficulty breathing. It wasn’t that she couldn’t function, she just grunted with each breath. So, off to the ER we went.
Surprisingly, there were not many people in the waiting room. We were whisked off to triage quickly and then brought to a room. Not much later, the doctor showed up to check Pumpkin out. He ordered an X-ray and a breathing treatment. I couldn’t decide whether to be relieved to have them come quickly for everything or to worry that something was really wrong.
In the end, the diagnosis is croup. I think because she’s been coughing so much already the croup really exacerbated her condition. I also think she may have asthma. We’re home and she’s feeling better if a bit nnoyed at the prodding, poking and shots.
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These are so fun. HT: Alice
You Are Pretty Logical 
You’re a bit of a wizard when it comes to logic
While you don’t have perfect logic, you logic is pretty darn good
Keep at it – you’ve got a lot of natural talent in this area!
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